Why I’m Here

After the year that we’ve had and all that we’ve gone through it was suggested many times by my psychologist to write things down. ¬†She always seems to be right but it usually takes me a while before I agree or listen to her.

I resisted constantly, I think for fear of really having an outpouring of emotion that would be too much to handle.

A few times I wrote down snippets of our story on Facebook on the special page created for Lucia and I received many comments and messages encouraging me to write our story.

In November 2012 we went on our first holiday as a family of five. We travelled up the East Coast of Australia for a little over a month.

During our holiday I felt as if the clouds were parting and I could see the sunshine again.

We got home in a few days before Christmas and on our first day back home one of our neighbours came to say hello. I knew her daughter was having her third baby and asked if the baby had been born. She told me he was nine months old.

I couldn’t believe it, had I really not paid attention to anything that happened in the world since the 14th November 2011 when my twins were born?

A few days later I went out with a few friends for a paddle board on the lake. It was quite an enlightening time for me, I couldn’t stop looking around me at the sun shining, the water glistening, smiling faces, hearing my friends talk to me. I realised that after a year of experiencing every stage of grief I had come out the other side.

Because of Charlize my life was fuller, more meaningful and I was appreciative off everything around me. It was then that I wanted to write the story of our family and share it with our friends.

Thank you to everyone new and old who have helped me travel this journey that I wish no parent has to endure.

I hope you enjoy my blog “Orluchiana”.

Sending love, strength and happiness to those that have lost a child. I hope that this in someway helps you in your journey of grief.

With much love
Christine xx